Join our first #buddyapp Tweetchat

Join our first #buddyapp Tweetchat

On Tuesday 26th of August between 12:00-14:00 we are holding the first of what will become monthly tweet chats for anyone and everyone interested in or using Buddy App. We would like to invite you to join in the conversation:

Follow the @BuddyAppUK Twitter Account

Tweet us using the tag #buddyapp

If you don’t have a twitter account you can still participate:

Email your questions, comments or thoughts to info@buddyapp.co.uk or speak to your comms team about getting involved.

We look forward to tweeting with you!

The Buddy Team

I’m not brave

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“Thank you for talking, you are so brave”

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I talk about my mental health very openly. In fact if you’re reading this blog you may well have seen me give a talk, workshop or presentation or even on television talking about some issue or concept in mental health; usually weaving in some of my own experiences. I probably look like a natural, as though i’ve been an open book my whole life.

All in all it has taken me 19 years to get to this point. I’ve been ill or at least symptomatic since the age of six. It took me eight years to get a diagnosis, another five until I started opening up and another two  until I really made my peace with my experiences.

For the last six years, since the age of 19 I have had the incredible pleasure and honour of being involved with the mental health charity YoungMinds. Before then I was so far in the mental health closet you could saw I was in Narnia. They not only helped me find my voice but helped me to nurture it and form a narrative around my experiences.

The effect has been profound. During my school years I was completely unable to speak in front of groups of people and used to feign sickness for weeks to avoid the annual public speaking contest. The thought alone of standing up there with nothing but a sheet of notes to shield me caused incredible levels of nausea and anxiety leaving me all but paralysed. I certainly never, ever expected to stand in front of hundreds. In fact I doubt my teachers would recognise me now.

At this point I cannot comprehend what my life would have been like without these monumental changes but I do know I would have had a poorer life. I have spoken on record to such diverse organisations and people as the BBC, MTV, Royal Societies, politicians (including a PM) and many more and gained so much by letting go of my fears.

After every talk I give, people approach me. Some will put their hands up during Q&A sessions and speak openly in front of the group, many though will take me to one side after and quietly speak.

Without fail, at every single speech people do two things:

One in Four? More like four in four

1) They open up about their own run-ins with mental ill health.

Sometimes it is their own experience, something they have never disclosed before. Often it is about a friend or family member and they come to me in sadness or desperation. I have developed an uncanny ability to work out, during a talk, who will approach me afterwards.

This has taught me one simple thing; we are all affected by mental health and illness. We talk about the 1 in 4 statistic but that doesn’t sit well for me. We ALL have mental health just like we all have physically health; we sit on different points of the same spectrum. Which suggests to me that mental illness affects 4 in 4 of us..but only 1 in 4 will admit it. And perhaps even that statistic is too high.

2) “You are so brave” I’m not so sure

Secondly, I am told, almost like clockwork that I am “brave”

Now before I start unpicking this one let me say; I get it and I appreciate the sentiment. But it makes me sad.

I think what people see is a very young looking girl (more 15 than 25) standing up and opening up in a really honest way. Yes I am those things but I am much more. I have been standing up and telling my story repeatedly for six years and at this point I feel no fear, no misapprehension about what I do.

I am lucky because I do not need to be brave any more. Just myself.

It is brave to stand up and say something for the first time, to give words to wooly concepts and feelings. It is brave to stand up when you don’t know what the reaction to your words will be.

But what I have learnt, much to my early surprise, is that opening up about mental illness does not automatically mean opening yourself up to criticism and abuse. In fact 99% of the reaction I get is overwhelmingly positive and empathetic. So in fact all I am opening myself up to are compliments and smiles-that suddenly doesn’t seem too brave does it?

I am seen as brave for standing up and speaking when others don’t. And that is a damn shame. If you had my experiences you would see being open is a wonderful gift to be shared. Like I said in my blog about running up against anti-psychiatry Scientologists:

If I won’t stand up, someone who has been ill for a lifetime, used services for a decade and has worked for the NHS and mental health charities, how can I expect anyone else too?

I don’t want to be seen as brave but as a role model. I don’t want to be the only person on a podium or the token service user. I want us to stand up together, regardless of whether we are students, doctors, psychiatrists or siblings and talk.

I know it’s not very British but it shouldn’t be seen as brave either.

Join me Walking Out of Darkness

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Over the years i’ve watched many friends take part in fundraising events like Race For Life. I’ve always been so proud of their achievements and amazed by the scale of the events and the energy that surrounds them.

And yet it has always saddened me that there didn’t seem to be anything on a similar scale specifically for mental health. Sure you can take part in a thousand different types of marathons, triathlons or even do a skydive and support individual charities. I thought maybe wanting an event dedicated to this issue was a case of having eyes bigger than my stomach and being too ambitious and did not hold my breath waiting for one.

So, last year, when I first heard about CLASP charity and their planned Walking Out of Darkness event in London next month I was very intrigued.

clasp

A few weeks ago I had the genuine pleasure to speak to the man who started it all, CLASP CEO Kenny Johnston. Like me, Kenny is very open about his own experience of mental health issues and it was these experiences that led him to setting up CLASP and the CLASP helpline which will launch later this year.

Watch Kenny in this short video:

The walk will be held on July 19th starting at 8pm and there is a 5, 10 and 25 mile route depending on what you feel capable of. Personally, and sadly I will only be able to do the 5 mile walk at most this year. I am attempting, for once in my life, to be mindful of my limitations and practice some self care.

I will be joined by thousands of others including NHS England, the Department of Health, British Transport Police, Charities, Organisations, MPs and celebrities. The event is gathering huge momentum even before it has begun and I strongly recommend you follow on twitter and follow the hashtag #WalkingOutOfDarkness.

Mention me and get a discount!

I hope you will be joining me on the walk. If you do wish to register you can get a £10.00 discount by using the code “Kat10”. All money donated using this code will given to one of my favourite mental health charities, DWED, who do incredible work on a shoestring.

About Diabetics With Eating Disorders (DWED)

DWED supports people with Type 1 Diabetes and Eating Disorders and their carers in numerous ways including online, by phone and face to face. They also provide advocacy support for service users and training for professionals. I have worked with them recently alongside NHS England, myhealthlondon, London Strategic Clinical Networks and the WellHappy App on a project to raise awareness of Type 1 Eating Disorders and improve outcomes.

What was your experience of transition?

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Hey everyone,

If you know me then you’ve probably heard me get up on my soapbox about the issue of transitioning between CAMHS and Adult mental health services. I wrote my dissertation on it (Growing up in the system: Making the transition from CAMHS to Adult Services, 2010) and have spent a lot of the last five years campaigning to improve this area of treatment.

NHS England, the body set up by the government to improve the health of everyone in England, has taken on the challenge of young people’s mental health transition – and is determined to improve it. Because I work for NHS England and have a keen interest in this area i have teamed up with Yvonne Anderson from CERNIS to gather your views and experiences.

When we talk about transition we mean the difficulties faced by young people trying to access mental health services after the age of 16/17. This often means a move from CAMHS (Child and Adolescent Mental Health Services) to Adult services. We know that this a big problem for a lot of young people as many struggle to get the help they need or fall through the “gap” between adolescent and adult services.

The ambition of NHS England is to place service users, patients and the public at the heart of everything they do and they have asked us to consult with you.

Tell us online by taking this short survey. 

Prefer to talk? Contact Yvonne at: y.anderson@cernis.co.uk   

Alternatively you can use your reader on this QR code and go straight to the survey via a mobile device or tablet

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The Girl Behind The Door: A Memoir By John Brooks

Kat Cormack:

Dear Casey, i can’t believe so much time has passed since you left but i remember it like it was last week. You will always be missed but more importantly you will always be loved. I hope you have found peace.

Originally posted on Parenting and Attachment:

TGBTD-eBookCov_03-600“This book should be a wakeup call to all adoptive parents and professionals about the urgent issues adoptees and their parents face.”

Nancy Newton Verrier, attachment therapist and author

The Primal Wound and Coming Home to Self

A Marin County, California father embarks on a journey to understand what led his seventeen-year-old daughter, Casey, to take her life. He travels back to her abandonment at birth and adoption from a Polish orphanage. His search leads to a condition known as attachment disorder, an affliction common among children who have been abandoned, neglected or abused. It explained everything. The Girl Behind The Door integrates a tragic personal adoption story with information from the experts to teach other families what the Brookses learned too late.

Who should read it?

    Anyone with a connection to the adoption “triad.”
    Anyone who has lost a loved one to suicide.
   …

View original 45 more words

Talking about mental health on the Chrissy B show

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So some of you may know that late last year i appeared on the Chrissy B Show to talk about mental health in a special program titled “A mental health issue doesn’t mean i’m crazy”. The show was broadcast in January and is now available on YouTube for everyone to watch.

I first met Chrissy at a great event held at Westminster University called “Living or Surviving”. Chrissy spoke about her experiences of struggling with Depression at University and how she now tries to help other people with her inspirational television program. We were joined by speakers including Paul Canonville who talked very movingly about his own experiences of mental illness in sport and Professor Damien Ridge who is a psychotherapist.

You can watch me talk about mental health, the WellHappy app and working for both YoungMinds and the NHS below. I’m not on for the whole thing but it’s worth watching the whole episode:

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=OQLz3Nw2-4k&feature=share&list=UUHfwS2btVLvqqAQ-69c0PKw&index=3

 

Acceptance speech perhaps?

It’s taken me awhile to put out this first blog of the year. After the literal and figurative madness that sums up the end of 2013 I for some reason naively thought January might be a bit quieter..how wrong I was!

Over the Christmas holidays I was surprised to discover I had been nominated for not one but two awards from Mentally Wealthy. I’m a long time reader of the site and previous iterations such as This Week In Mentalists and have a huge amount of respect for the bloggers involved so I was certainly not expecting to see my own name appear in the nominations!

I came runner up in This Week In Mentalists Award 2013 in “Campaigning” and the Twitter based
Twental Health Awards 2013  in “Professional Not Otherwise Specified”.

Clearly all those teenage years hidden behind a computer screen blogging, moderating and being on social media paid off!-I have of course pointed this out to my parents to show them I didn’t waste my teenage years online! It is still something I have to pinch myself over though. As someone who at points genuinely didn’t expect to see her 16th birthday let alone their 24th it amazes me how far I have come. I’ve said many times before that if I could go back and tell my 14 year old self what things would be like in a decade I would most likely laugh in my own face. I am proof that it can and does get better even if “better” isn’t what you expected or planned.

Then, as if that wasn’t enough (and believe me i was taken aback as it was), Vinspired announced that I was a Regional Winner in their Vinspired National Awards as “Most Outstanding Social Entrepreneur” for my work on the WellHappy app.

This is a huge thing for both myself personally and for the WellHappy project and I am still so stunned that I’ve won.

So I guess I have to do some kind of acceptance speech? Don’t worry i’m not going to sit here for the next 10 pages and bore the pants off you but I do have some people that need to be thanked for their part in this.

YoungMinds

Firstly I need to thank YoungMinds which includes all the young people and staff I have been so fortunate to have in my life these past five years. It’s corny but it’s also fair to say that I could not have done this without you all and you deserve a lot of the credit for this award. Before I started volunteering with the charity I was very much in the mental health “closet”..now I am winning awards for speaking out about mental health & wellbeing. Participation helped me find my voice and campaigning gave me a platform and a purpose and I don’t dare think where I would be now without your support.

NHS

I also want to thank the NHS or more specifically my employers and colleagues within the NHS and in particular at myhealthlondon. When I was brought in to work in the NHS on secondment from YoungMinds for the WellHappy project it was a test, a trial run for 4 months. 15 months later I am still working with you after repeated contract extensions and a promotion. You took a chance on me, knowing full well all of my mental health history and that I was still technically a “young person”. It has been a pleasure having a job where I actually feel accepted and like I am able to do some good and make changes for the better.

And I would also like to say a big thank you to my wonderful friend Jenny Hills for nominating me.

And one last thank you to my long suffering boyfriend Ryan Jackson for putting up with me while i run around like, (once again both a literal & figurative) crazy lady. I certainly couldn’t have done half as much over the past 5 years without your support.

Anyway that is quite enough gushing for me for one day, i’m not sure it suits me! At this point I would probably trip over my feet on the way off stage.

And the thing is, this was only the start of the year and much has happened since then, but that is for another post.

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